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It was horrible, I started to get flashbacks the other day and last night was just as bad. I just wanted to confide in someone, to lay with someone, to hear that someone cares about me, but I know that’s not possible anymore. I know I shouldn’t call him, but I want to so bad. I keep on telling myself that he is the wrong person for me, but It makes it even harder not to call because I have his number memorized. I wonder sometimes how we “talked” for so long, but then again, I suppose it was the physical attraction that kept us together. When it comes down to it though, the physical aspect purely isn’t enough because he still made me feel horrible and my pain is still evident when I wake up each morning.

: Reconcile:

The time is coming near, or are the days just running further away from me? I do not know, or do I? Am I just choosing not to see what is in front of me? I know things though, not everything, but something’s. I shouldn’t want this passion, but I want it and I can’t control how I feel. I wish I didn’t have this feeling inside of me, I wish I could make it go away, but I can’t, I want it and I am struggling my heart every day and this is what my heart says to my mind when I’m about to sleep at night:

Running my hands on your skin
You’re my uncharted map

I want to seek you within

Time is passing
I feel your body trembling
This love is amazing

I’m inside

Our being is one
We are together
Holding each other
Giving one another
This is timeless pleasure

Then I awake
I’m empty
I’m confused
For this feeling
This moment
Was far from perfect

I was left abused