Wow, today is such a great day! My friend bought me a double shot espresso and I feel as though I am on cloud nine. You know what? Whenever I write, I have no idea what I’m writing about, until after I read it when it’s complete. I feel like I am possessed and it’s such an awesome feeling to be mastered by words. Remember the guy that I had written about earlier? The one that had given me the flower, well, I told him that he was wasting his time making an effort with me. He told me that the biggest thing that he fears is not taking a chance and that’s why he is being so persistent in seeing if we could possibly be something. I honestly wish I could trust him, but I’m in need of some spiritual healing and right now a guy can’t help me even though it’s so tempting.
: When I Awake In The Morning:
In disguise
Yet I am still recognized
As a whole
I am unable to hide
Intentionally
My heart is hidden deep within my interior
My ears hear constant whispers
It seems pointless at times to want to survive
Yet failure never abides
Trouble finds me some how,
But that is just how things are
Trouble
How can I just ignore it?
I have to face it
Over come it and even embrace it
To Me
The trouble is like the wind
I can’t avoid it
Unless I hide inside at all times
But that’s not the way I want to live my life
Yet it makes me stronger and helps me survive
I awake in the morning
To put on a new face
Not wanting to be recognized
Sexual prey I am
Hiding behind my exterior
I still can’t hide properly
My disguise is faulty
I recognize this is the life I have been given
Rough at times, but also a gift from the heavens
Yet my heart feels like it’s in a cage
And theirs no door to open it
Nothing to set it free
But there’s something’s I can’t prevent
For this is how my life was meant to be
Until someone breaks the cage to my heart
And sets it free
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